The sleaziest sporting event since the Berlin Olympics: With one crude gesture, Robbie Williams sums up the whole tawdry circus of Putin’s World Cup, says ROBERT HARDMAN

• e-mail

Radiating all the magic of root canal treatment, the sleaziest global sporting event since the 1936 Berlin Olympics kicked off the evening with a charmless little ceremony and a lopsided match between the two worst teams atVladimir Putin's latest vanity project.

ITV commentator Clive Tyldesley neatly captured the esprit of the 2018 FIFA World Cup in his opening line: 'A game between the world's two biggest crude oil-producing nations.'

The hosts, Russia, were indeed playing Saudi Arabia. There sat President Putin and the Saudi Crown Prince, either side of the president of the utterly discredited world football authority, FIFA. What a perfect curtain-raiser for a tournament that has always been about money.

Crass and irresponsible: Robbie Williams sticks a finger up during the live show, to the dismay of many viewers

There sat President Putin and the Saudi Crown Prince, either side of the president of the utterly discredited world football authority, FIFA. What a perfect curtain-raiser for a tournament that has always been about money

Unfortunately, the host broadcaster was so inept that Putin appeared to be speaking in front of a half-lit garage door

They had chosen Robbie Williams as the star turn, perhaps in the hope of injecting a mild note of irreverence

Williams attracted widespread criticism in Russia two years ago for his latest hit, Party Like A Russian

Remember this championship was a perversion of justice the very moment FIFA awarded it to Russia back in 2010. Since that vote – in which England's bid came last by a mile – the world footballing authority has been exposed as a global extortion racket. Its former president, Sepp Blatter, has now been banned from having anything to with football for six years.

Of his cabal of corkscrew-shaped ex-FIFA officials, some are in the clink, some are awaiting sentencing and others are fighting extradition to the USA which has been probing global soccer corruption ever since.

No such problems for our World Cup hosts, however. During the same period, the Russians may have invaded their neighbours, shot down a civilian airliner, stirred up war in Syria, been banned from the Olympics and organised state-sponsored terrorism on the streets of Britain. But none of that has ever threatened to dislodge this World Cup from the grip of President Putin.

'Russians love football. It is what we call love at first sight,' declared the ex-KGB colonel ahead of last night's kick-off in Moscow's Luzhniki Stadium. 'Welcome to Russia!'

Unfortunately, the host broadcaster was so inept that Putin appeared to be speaking in front of a half-lit garage door.

We were thus spared the sight of the full galaxy of stars filling the presidential box around him. Putin's stature as a revered world statesman was reflected in a VIP turnout consisting of the leaders of Abkhazia, Azerbaijan, Armenia, Belarus, Bolivia, Kazakhstan, Kyrgyzstan, Lebanon, Moldova, Panama, Paraguay, Rwanda, Tajikistan, Uzbekistan and South Ossetia. Oddly, none of these except Panama actually had a team in the tournament.

Iron fist: Saudi Crown Prince Mohammed bin Salman greets Vladimir Putin as FIFA president Gianni Infantino looks on

Putin's stature as a revered world statesman was reflected in a VIP turnout consisting of the leaders of Abkhazia, Azerbaijan, Armenia, Belarus, Bolivia, Kazakhstan, Kyrgyzstan, Lebanon, Moldova, Panama, Paraguay, Rwanda, Tajikistan, Uzbekistan and South Ossetia 

Pow wow: Putin and his new friend embrace midway through the match 

At least the opening ceremony was mercifully brief. Unlike the Olympics, World Cup opening ceremonies are governed by FIFA, not by the hosts. FIFA had decided to keep the overture to the most politically sensitive World Cup of all time to a minimum – 15 minutes in fact.

They had chosen Robbie Williams as the star turn, perhaps in the hope of injecting a mild note of irreverence. Williams attracted widespread criticism in Russia two years ago for his latest hit, Party Like A Russian.

The video for the song features Williams living the oligarch dream as he sings: 'Ain't no refutin' or disputin'/I'm a modern Rasputin/Subcontract disputes to some brutes in Louboutin/Act highfalutin' while my boys put the boots in.'

Now I wonder what all that could rhyme with.

The former Take That singer managed to lower the tone – inexplicably sticking his middle finger up at the camera during the live performance

Inappropriate: The broadcast was being watched by an estimated one billion people 

Unsurprisingly, that song had been removed from the playlist last night. Instead, the nightingale of Stoke-on-Trent stuck to a few old favourites like Let Me Entertain You.

But then the former Take That singer managed to lower the tone – inexplicably sticking his middle finger up at the camera during the live performance. The broadcast was being watched by an estimated one billion people.

Fans reacted angrily with one writing online: 'What a joke! I'm watching with my kids and that happened? Wow.'

A teacher said her Year One students were 'sticking their middle fingers up at each other' after watching the performance.

Williams was surrounded by a modest band of dancers dressed either as footballs or Russian cosmonauts carrying what appeared to be flashing ironing boards during the show.

I think we can safely say that Danny Boyle, the architect of the London 2012 opening ceremony, had not been hired for this event.

It had a deliciously dated feel, right down to the pointless walk-on part for a former Miss Russia (the MeToo thing has yet to reach Russia). This was Austin Powers-meets-Eurovision – without the humour.

And so on with the game, which Russia won by a thumping 5-0 margin

A low-tech giant bird on stilts flapped in bearing the Russian opera singer, Aida Garifullina, to sing a duet with Williams.

Apparently he was also meant to sing Rock DJ but the television coverage cut away to a panel of football pundits so we didn't hear that. At least ITV's coverage loyally resumed in time for Mr Putin.

His speech lasted nearly as long as Robbie Williams. The President also seemed to receive rather wilder applause than the British pop star. Those Russians really do know how to party. And so on with the game, which Russia won by a thumping 5-0 margin. The cameras kept cutting to the sight of Mr Putin and the Saudi Crown Prince.

What a perfect curtain-raiser for a tournament that has always been about money.

Dinner time: Moldovan President Igor Dodon, Kyrgyz President Sooronbay Jeenbekov, Russian President Vladimir Putin and Saudi Arabia's Crown Prince Mohammad bin Salman

I kept my eye on Twitter, expecting a thunderous wave of denunciations from the chatterati. Here were two leaders of two nations with infamously unreconstructed attitudes towards human rights, particularly when it comes to gay people, women and minorities.

Given how incandescent the liberal Left become at any suggestion that Donald Trump might be having a good day, I looked for outrage. I looked in vain.

Ahead of Vladimir Putin's Winter Olympics in Sochi four years ago, British celebrities lined up behind Stephen Fry to demand an 'absolute ban' on the Games because of Russian homophobia. 'The idea that sport and politics don't connect is worse than disingenuous, worse than stupid,' Fry wrote in a furious letter to the Prime Minister, David Cameron, backed by all the usual suspects.

Yet, there was barely a batsqueak of condemnation for the World Cup.

As far as we know, not a single luvvie has penned an open letter to the Prime Minister demanding that the England team should be brought home. Perhaps it is fine to complain about our participation in minority posh sports like skiing that no one cares about whereas different rules apply when it comes to football.

After all, as BBC pundit Gary Lineker has reminded us this month, it is very hypocritical for anyone in Britain to criticise Russia's hosting of this tournament.

That is because the UK is just as evil. 'Who are we to start getting judgmental on who should have the World Cup?' Lineker asked the Radio Times. 'We all know how corrupt our country is at times. Perhaps we don't like some things that Putin has done, but we'll be there, we'll be their guests.'

We now have four weeks of this ugly charade to go before Putin removes the mirthless smile from his face and the Cold War resumes as usual

It takes a bold person to prick the vast bubble of hype around the start of a World Cup. One such, however, is the eternal human rights campaigner, Peter Tatchell. While other so-called 'activists' fire off the occasional tweet and demand a Waitrose boycott of things they disapprove of, Tatchell is the real thing. He frequently ends up in hospital as well as jail for his troubles.

Having made it to Russia, the indefatigable Aussie-born Londoner began a one-man protest outside the Kremlin attacking Russian persecution of gay men in Chechnya – and was arrested.

He was later released, having been told he can either leave the country by the end of the month or return for a further hearing. No sign of a celebrity 'Twitterstorm' in his defence, though.

We now have four weeks of this ugly charade to go before Putin removes the mirthless smile from his face and the Cold War resumes as usual. At least, given England's form, we should be heading for home soon enough.

There is precious little chance of Harry Kane going up to the presidential box to receive the trophy from Putin. But if it does happen, Harry, remember not to shake his hand. You don't know where it's been.

World Cup Shorts

Theresa May has backed postal workers who want to fly the England flag on their vans after Royal Mail banned them from doing so.

The Royal Mail said a policy in place for a number of years had allowed workers to display flags – such as the Cross of St George – in offices, but not on vehicles.

But Mrs May's official spokesman said: 'The Royal Mail's policies are a matter for them. But the Prime Minister believes everybody should be able to show their support for the England football team and hopes a way can be found for people to do that.

'The Prime Minister wishes the England football team the very best and hopes the country enjoys cheering them on.'

A Royal Mail spokesman added: 'Flags should not be flown on vehicles as Royal Mail has a duty of care both to all employees and to members of the public.

'Flags placed on vehicles can obscure the driver's view. They can also pose a potential hazard to other road users if they are lost when the vehicle is moving.

'We do want our colleagues to have every opportunity to follow the World Cup but we need to continue to provide services to customers.

'There will be flags on display in Royal Mail offices and live radio commentary playing on PA systems during matches.'

East and West squared up in a series of provocative military exercises to coincide with the start of the World Cup.

British troops joined a force of 18,000 on Russia's doorstop as Putin ordered his largest naval war games for ten years. The Russian President's immense show of force, expected to continue into next week, involves 36 warships and 20 aircraft off the country's north coast, near Norway.

Meanwhile Sabre Strike, a US-led war exercise taking place on the outskirts of the Lithuanian city of Kaunas, was designed to prepare nations near Russia for a 'hypothetical attack'.

Both nations were clear the exercises were not meant as a provocation, but the displays were timed to coincide with the World Cup kicking off.

Five female Russian football hooligans were placed on a banned list to stop them attending the tournament.

Described as 'Lady Hools' two of the quintet – Katya Sakalavichyus, 29, and Diana Ivanova, 20, – were denied access to all 'sporting events' by a court in Tula, over 100 miles south of Moscow, after setting off flares.

Ksenia Frolova, 27, was also excluded after a conviction for drunken behaviour, but that ban will end next Wednesday.

And 52-year-old Galina Bebeshko was banned for a year after trouble at a Moscow stadium. The fifth female on the list was Anastasia Lukomskaya, 24, but her exclusion was lifted last month.

All eyes are on a white cat that lives in the Hermitage Museum in St Petersburg...as it's had a winning streak predicting match results. 

Achilles, who was born in the museum, predicted three out of four winners in the Confederation Cup in 2017. 

Last night he was still on form, indicating Russia would beat Saudi Arabia. 

How does he do it? 

Museum staff offer him two bowls of cat food with team flags adorning each one. Whichever food Achilles chooses is his predicted winner.