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Strictly Come Dancing star Karen Hauer has reflected on her protracted and painful divorce from Kevin Clifton and toxic third marriage to a man she originally met online. 

In a far reaching interview with Paul C. Brunson's We Need To Talk podcast, Hauer says she and Clifton maintained a professional facade on Strictly while behind-the-scenes their three year marriage fell apart. 

She also alleges that third husband Jordan Wyn-Jones, who she met on Instagram, barely contributed financially to their relationship and left her so emotionally stressed that she started losing her hair. 

The Venezuelan-American ballroom specialist, 43, married Clifton, her second husband, in 2015 - three years after joining Strictly's team of professionals. 

They would announce their divorce in 2018, and Hauer admits the separation played out behind the scenes for months before she finally confirmed they were no longer together. 

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Strictly Come Dancing star Karen Hauer has reflected on her protracted and painful divorce from Kevin Clifton and subsequent ill-fated marriage to a man she originally met online

Strictly Come Dancing star Karen Hauer has reflected on her protracted and painful divorce from Kevin Clifton and subsequent ill-fated marriage to a man she originally met online 

The Venezuelan-American ballroom specialist married Clifton, her second husband, in 2015 - three years after joining the Strictly team of professionals

The Venezuelan-American ballroom specialist married Clifton, her second husband, in 2015 - three years after joining the Strictly team of professionals

Appearing on the latest edition of Paul C. Brunson's podcast, Hauer, 43, insisted it was she who instigated the separation when it became clear that he had 'distanced himself' from the marriage. 

She said: 'This one hurt, because we belonged together. You wouldn't say each other's names without following the other person's name.

'I felt that he distanced himself from me, but I was probably doing the same. Because I felt that if you don't want me then OK, I'll retreat, I'll give you your space. It was one of those, where we're both not talking about it. 

'I was like, "Do you want a divorce? Do you want to split up? I don't know what I want to do. What do you want to do? Do you know what you want? I don't know what I want. Are we broken up?"' 

'So it took a while actually, it took about a year... behind the scenes. In front of the scenes everything was normal. 

'We fell apart, and me not knowing... obviously, I didn't know what was happening in his mind and whether he wanted to be with me or not.' 

Despite calling time on the marriage after just three years, Hauer claimed she would have worked at salvaging their relationship had he wanted to be with her.  

She said: 'I knew that I would've worked on it - I would've stayed.  But at the same time, I couldn't be with someone who wasn't sure of whether they wanted to be with me or not. I couldn't wait.

She married third husband Jordan Wyn-Jones in 2023 (pictured together in 2022)

She married third husband Jordan Wyn-Jones in 2023 (pictured together in 2022)

Strictly Come Dancing star Karen Hauer says her marriage to Kevin Clifton collapsed over the course of a year while they maintained a public show of togetherness on the BBC show

Strictly Come Dancing star Karen Hauer says her marriage to Kevin Clifton collapsed over the course of a year while they maintained a public show of togetherness on the BBC show

Clifton embarked on a new relationship with documentarian Stacey Dooley after meeting her on the BBC show. The couple welcomed a daughter together in 2023

Clifton embarked on a new relationship with documentarian Stacey Dooley after meeting her on the BBC show. The couple welcomed a daughter together in 2023

'I waited for a while, and I was giving him his space to think, and then funnily enough I met someone. I was literally waiting to be loved.

'He just wanted a divorce, and I didn't fight it. Something had to happen in order for him to make a decision, because I wasn't going to make the decision. 

'I wasn't going to pull the plug. So then I tripped and then the grenade went off. You know, I pulled the pin.'

She added: 'It was tough for him, tough for me. It was tough for both of us at that moment. 

'I could see he didn't want to let go. But that didn't give him any choice. He had to do the right thing for himself.' 

Despite their separation, Hauer insisted she and Clifton maintained a mutual admiration for one another as trained professionals on Strictly Come Dancing. 

She said: 'The respect we had for each other in the workplace. We respected one another, you know. 

'We never said a bad word about one another. I think that's because we hold each other to such a high regard, you know. 

'There will always be love there. So, we still danced together on the show and we were still working around each other. We would still applaud each other, support each other. 

'We never lost that and that was what was really sad, that we could and transfer that onto our relationship.' 

Despite calling time on the marriage after just three years, Hauer admitted she would have worked at salvaging their relationship had he wanted to be with her

Despite calling time on the marriage after just three years, Hauer admitted she would have worked at salvaging their relationship had he wanted to be with her

Appearing on the latest edition of Paul C. Brunson's We Need To Talk podcast, Hauer insisted it was she who instigated the separation

Appearing on the latest edition of Paul C. Brunson's We Need To Talk podcast, Hauer insisted it was she who instigated the separation

Clifton subsequently embarked on a new relationship with documentarian Stacey Dooley after meeting her on the set of Strictly Come Dancing. The couple welcomed a daughter together in 2023. 

Meanwhile Hauer went on to date opera singer David Webb before entering a new relationship with businessman Jordan Wyn-Jones, the man who would ultimately become her third husband. 

Originally from Brighton, Wyn-Jones was living in Sydney when he began following Hauer on Instagram. 

She followed him back and they began to exchange messages before regularly speaking on FaceTime. 

The businessman eventually relocated to the UK, with the couple marrying in 2022, but the marriage soon crumbled and the couple announced their separation just 16-months later. 

She said: 'I got myself into a relationship that I shouldn't have. I felt embarrassed that I couldn't keep anyone around me and I said to myself, "No, I'm not going to get into a relationship... spend some time on your own."

'But I don't know how to be on my own.'

Looking back on their relationship, Hauer says her former husband rarely contributed financially after moving into the home she owned before they met. 

'He was saying to me I'm going to get a job soon, I'm going to help out when I can. But I work hard for my money and I was bankrolling everything,' she claimed. 

'I wasn't home alone, but there was nothing that fulfilled me. He wasn't providing anything, there was no enhancement in my emotional being, my physical being. 

'I was working, doing my thing, coming in and out of the house and letting him settle down.' 

She would embark on a new relationship businessman with Jordan Wyn-Jones, the man who would ultimately become her third husband, soon after

She would embark on a new relationship businessman with Jordan Wyn-Jones, the man who would ultimately become her third husband, soon after 

Originally from Brighton, Wyn-Jones was living in Sydney when he started to follow Karen on Instagram

Originally from Brighton, Wyn-Jones was living in Sydney when he started to follow Karen on Instagram 

And Hauer admits her family saw the red flags long before the relationship turned toxic and she found herself in 'a situation she couldn't control.' 

She recalled: 'They weren't excited by him at all because to other people it was like a big no. Like no, she'll get rid of him quick. And I didn't because it just got worse. 

'"I don't have what you have." Well, yeah, but I need to go to work every day. "Yeah, but I never see you." 

'Then "Oh, but are you cheating on me?" No, no, I'm not, I'm not cheating on you. "So, are you cheating?" No. No, I'm not cheating on you. I just like that person's Instagram post. 

'"Are you sure you're not sleeping with that person?" No, no, no. "Can you send me a picture of where you are and who you're with?" 

'l had to check in everywhere I went.' 

She added: 'Whatever he had going on, whatever was happening, I didn't want to be a part of it. So, I'd just leave. I’d just go away and then I'd come back. “When can I come back home? Five days later. Okay. Are the dogs okay? Yeah, they're fine. You can come back now." 

'But the grip that he had on me, it paralysed me. It's really hard to explain. When he proposed to me, I didn't tell anybody. 

'Why was I so attached to this feeling of insecurity, of gaslighting to the max. In my previous relationships, there was no such thing as that. There were probably hints of it, but this was at a different level.

'Finding myself in a situation where I couldn't control because I was afraid.' 

'I got myself into a relationship that I shouldn't have,' Hauer explained during Brunson's latest podcast

'I got myself into a relationship that I shouldn't have,' Hauer explained during Brunson's latest podcast

Meanwhile, Hauer will return to Strictly Come Dancing this year following recent claims that she had been axed

Meanwhile, Hauer will return to Strictly Come Dancing this year following recent claims that she had been axed 

Hauer says the relationship became so stressful that she started losing her hair, struggled with crippling panic attacks and became isolated from her friends. 

She said: 'It's almost like he had a hold of me and I just didn't know how to… I started losing my hair, panic attacks. I couldn't sleep. I couldn't do my job properly. And I couldn't get away from him. 

'I wasn't allowed to go to places with my friends because he thought that we would talk about him. And I was so battered emotionally that I just didn't care. 

'I mean I was working most of the time down in London, so I don't really know what else was happening behind my back. I was just in panic mode. Panic mode. Love should not panic.'

She added: 'It's almost like he made up things to scare me so then I wouldn't go anywhere. But it's okay. I just get on with it. I get on with it and I smile because I don't want to cause trouble. 

'I don't want to shake things up because that will put you in a bad mood which then makes my day really awful. And that's the state I lived in.' 

Unable to address the state of her relationship head on, Hauer says she would feign happiness just to make life bearable. 

She recalled: 'I would lie. So, I was not only lying to my family and my friends about where I was mentally and how I was feeling physically and they were seeing it, but I was lying to him as well because that's the only way that I could get through the day and keep peace.' 

'The way that my body was telling me that there was something wrong with my central nervous system, emotionally, physically, everything was showing to the point where the day of the wedding, my brother came up to me and he was like, "We can walk out right now. Walk out with me." 

The couple eventually married at Chewton Glen in Hampshire on June 7,  2022, with Strictly Come Dancing co-star Luba Mushtuk serving as bridesmaid. 

Hauer wore a 'fairytale' handmade tulle and floral applique gown by Berta on the big day, but behind the scenes she says her friends and family were pleading with her to call it off.  

She said: 'My friends, everyone was trying to stop this from happening. I wish they would have just taken me. 

'I wish they would have grabbed me and just put me in a car and I would have kicked and screamed, but I wouldn't have gone through more hell because it didn't hurt me physically so you couldn't see it. 

'It was that digging, digging, digging, punching, punching, every dig, every text, every call. Why did I let someone do that to me?”

Last year, she was partnered with former footballer Paul Merson, but the pair were eliminated in week five (pictured 2024)

Last year, she was partnered with former footballer Paul Merson, but the pair were eliminated in week five (pictured 2024)

Shortly before announcing their separation, Hauer revealed they were having counselling to help them with their relationship. 

She told HELLO! magazine at the time: 'Counselling. You know what I think communication is massive but learning how to communicate, you know, so we get outside help.

'So whenever we're having tricky moments or anything like that, it's just seeing the vulnerable side of each other and understanding it and knowing that both of us are working on things because nobody is perfect.'

She added: 'There is no such thing as a happy marriage or a happy relationship with the perfect couple.

'It's about dealing with things the right way and not just running away from things, and I guess that's what makes us tick even better and understand one another.'

Meanwhile, Hauer will return to Strictly Come Dancing this year following recent claims that she had been axed. 

It was rumoured that the programme's longest-serving dancer had been dropped by bosses, sparking an 'ageism' row among the cast. 

But Hauer will be back as normal when the series returns in September.

The dancer, who joined the lineup in 2012, is yet to win the glitter ball trophy but has reached several finals including with celebrity partners Made In Chelsea's Jamie Laing and former TOWIE star Mark Wright.

Last year, she was partnered with former footballer Paul Merson, 57, but the pair were eliminated in week five and the previous season the dancer performed with DJ Eddie Kadi.

A TV source told MailOnline: 'Karen is a well loved and respected member of the Strictly cast and there's no way she would be axed, especially not because of her age.

'She has dedicated years to the programme and can't wait to get back in the training room with a new partner in the next coming months.'

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